These days I feel my pregnant brain struggles to translate my thoughts into words.
But, I’d rather keep trying than just quit all together.
Just like my attempts to be more like Christ.
I think I’m a pretty good person, I have a few flaws…
which may also include a few choice words usually only spoken in my head – MOST of the time I can keep them in my head – and really, I try to keep them out of my head too.
The battle is raging folks – it is raging – and sometimes I lose.
I had a Relief Society (only the largest Women’s Organization in the world!!) presidency meeting (of which I am a part of) last week and one of the women I serve along side happen to mention a quote by the Prophet Joseph Smith:
“I love that man better who swears a stream as long as my arm yet deals justice to his neighbors and mercifully deals his substance to the poor, than the long, smooth-faced hypocrite. I do not want you to think that I am very righteous, for I am not.”
Now I really am trying to be like Jesus, I consistently fall short like the next guy – but I keep trying – and it makes my heart feel a little better knowing that it’s okay to stumble – just. keep. trying.
because as we all know and like Joseph also said, “There was one good man and his name was Jesus.”
Why all the potty words? Oh, just me being annoyed at things (more so than usual; again, pregnancy). Example: people who are looking at their phones while driving. So, so irate over those people.
When I line up my troubles next to the Savior, I feel a little silly with how I react to my trials.
Recently, in addition to feeling a bit yucky due to pregnancy, our house has fallen prey to illness.
It started on my son’s third birthday a few weeks ago.
I woke up, the day we were heading to the zoo, with a really sore throat…that turned into a really bad cold, that my baby also caught. Cue lots of “weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth.”
My sweet child had turned sour.
So the baby and I had this virus that lasted for two weeks that, for both of us, turns into an infection. His a double ear and I a sinus.
We both started antibiotics about the time my husband and three year old start coughing…
Did it help that my baby started teething? probably not.
So, string of swear words on repeat in my mind – and brink of insanity due to lack of sleep – I realize one afternoon how petty (really petty) my problems are.
I compared my problems, not only to Christ, but to the rest of the world and was reminded that I was so blessed.
It seems to me that when I face trials, it ends with me realizing how blessed I am and grateful I am to God for easing my burdens in difficult times.
It could be so much worse.
Even after this revelation I said a potty word, but I resolved to do better and take the time to share what I have learned on my blog, in the hopes that someone needs the same reminder.
We all mess up, we can all be better.
I want to be better.